Monday, September 10, 2007

Assets that people play with...

Monday night, I was standing in a small queue at a famous ice cream parlour. Something cushiony, hard hit my elbow. CUT. A week back I was on my routine visit to my favourite vegetable vendor. In the little space that I occupied beneath his stall, something huge and soft hit my elbow and was literally driving me into the blood-red tomatoes that I was picking up in my basket. CUT. A few months back, I used to take the Delhi Metro while coming back from work. There were these lean guys and girls whom I observed being constantly tortured by the same cushiony thing. And the thing I speak of, is not the 'one and only', but many of the enormously huge bellies that the overweight Unclejis and Auntyjis happen to use as an asset in times when they break the queues, pushing innocent little creatures like us, and having their go first.
Now, to the first Uncleji at the ice cream parlour, I gave a peace of my mind by declaring aloud my status in the queue. He got nasty stares from all around and I was happy with that. The second Uncleji at the vegetable stall was about to get a chance to know how strong my elbow is, but I refrained at the last moment, because I figured that there was very less space and he could not fit in there without intruding into my space. God is merciful. For, later on, when I saw the face of that man, he turned out to be a friend of dad's. Haha.
The Unclejis and Auntyjis travelling by the Delhi Metro are the grossest! They do it for fun. And it can cause severe injuries to their fellow travellers. To deal with them just nudge them a little (not much) hard in their food tanks and walk off. Rude as it may sound, this is the only way to teach them a lesson, and perhaps inspire them to lose weight. ;)

23 comments:

J said...

Hahahahaha... Lol!! The pot bellied world :P

burf said...

which ice cream parlour is your fav and which flavour?

Aarbee said...

Oh..I've nudged I've nudged! :P

Pritika said...

hehehehe!!! I love the term 'food tanks'!! The thought of being ousted by the cushiony tank fills me with foreboding!

Gonecase said...

Food tanks...lol, Every rice-sambhar eating creature over here owns one, irrespective of whether they are uncles-aunties or not !

Juhi Varun Dhingra said...

wow...how true is that...people with pot bellies pushing others around to get more space! I remember my days in Delhi buses when I used my elbow tad-too-often to protect myself from these nudges. Wish they would learn to respect other people's space and their bodies!!

Ankur said...

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! :D

Rohit Talwar said...

What a thought!
I KNOW about the Metro thing. As soon as the metro stops at the platform, these tummy people totally take advantage of that. People already don't know what queues are for and they make it worse. Buggers. Why can't they mind their own space? ;)

Reeta Skeeter said...

J: :P
===================================
burf: huh?
===================================
aarbee: Cool! Good to see you drop by... Nudge more! :D
===================================
pritika: :D I know what you mean.
===================================
gonecase: LOL! Nice on that.
===================================
juhi: You did? cool!
===================================
ankur: :P
===================================
Rohit Talwar: Because they are not minding their tummies :D
===================================

burf said...

??

Red Ginger said...

lol !! hey u spoke about the soft, cushiony bellies.. wat abt the 'hard stuff' guys keep pressing against the girls ??.. i had even slapped a few when i used to travel to college..

p.s. m not pointing to any of the guys here :-p

~ | | OM | | ~ said...

hehe !!

and we were talking about Delhi issues somewhere !!!

~ Deeps ~ said...

haha........good one

wacko said...

does this post mean uve lost a lot of weight? cuz i remember reading one of your posts earlier where you were so determined to lose weight climbing your office staircase *tries being innocent*

umangexuberance said...

ROTFL
really good one reeta..

talk about belly dancers..we have the belly warriors here :D

Manasi said...

heheheehe!!!!!
mazzzzeee :-D

c a a p i r i g h t e r said...

This is just not fair. I am not taking this lying down against my community. People can get fat, even when they do everything - exercise, eat healthy.
Latest study suggests, it cd be because of virus, or hormonal problem, or it could be in the genes!

Sniff!!! I need tissues!!!

IR said...

hi nice blog
very funny post

Peenuts said...

Nice idea..wl giv it a try next time when i am in Delhi :P

Apoorv Gawde said...

lol, good one!

Subhadip said...

Good tips! If all of us follow them, maybe you can write another post called "Others' liabilities that we play with"

Łóòň Ġãĺ said...

teeheeheee been there done that ;p

Prax said...

The battle of the belly bears...I'd not mind tellin' at Delhi Metro, Balloon phat jayega, sambhal ke. bein' thin is no sin!